Maybe I'm just brainwashed by cinema, but I have always craved the extra-ordinary out of my lovers.
I know that people like characters in films exist. Or at least the things that I see them doing in films that I like are things that I know people in real life have done or do similar like things in 'real-life'.
Sure every day can't be like a film, and elaborate presents and gestures aren't necessary for every day-otherwise it wouldn't be special.
But even changing the simple every-day things into something a little different, like leaving a personalized note in my purse secretly before work for me to discover later, or calling me and whether I answer or not sing me an 'I love you' message to me even if you have no tone.
I know it's my fault as well I let things slide, and maybe I should say that I want more grand gestures or special moments of love in my life more often?
I don't expect everything out of a relationship/ person that I am with, it's ridiculous to, but there is something to be said about doing something unexpected and special for someone without thinking about getting something in return.
That's not saying that you have to spend money either. Most people think that you have to take someone out to dinner/movie/theater/club/gig/show/bar/etc.etc. and spend gobs of money or buy an electronic/bike/instrument/clothing/pumpkin/etc. etc. for it to be accepted as a gift/surprise. Which is soooooooo wrong.
Let's make a memory together. I'd love to come home to be presented with a sheet tent covering the entire living room where we lounge on pillows and pretend to be somewhere lavish and cozy. It's not child-like or cheap, maybe it's nostalgic but it just shows that even small gestures where you take a little time out of your day to do something special and unexpected for someone else can be as simple as that.
I don't even know if I know who I'm talking to.
People in my future?
Well maybe that is it....so I think I will give the people in my future a head-start, here is a nice list of simple things to do for someone unexpectedly:
. If you wake up before the other person in bed, leave them a message on the pillow.
. Actually this one will be about messages everywhere. leave them in them in bags/purses/around toothbrushes/on the backside of a ketchup bottle in the fridge/on the fridge with magnets/ shaved into your pets fur/ written on their skin where they will find randomly/ send a letter in the mail - even if you live in the same place/ in lunchboxes .
. Ask them to meet you somewhere [ the park, at the 12th floor of a nearby hotel, the produce section @ the grocery-mart, the library, your local make-out point, underneath a pretty tree, a garden, the backseat of your vehicle, on a specific bus/bus-stop, the puppy store....] and share a hug/kiss/conversation/different perspective together [if they ask why you asked them there, just say..."i just wanted to do this[hug/kiss/sing to them/read poetry] to you here".
. Read them your favorite book a little bit every week/day, or get the same book and read it together and discuss each chapter and strange plot twist and character together, that goes the same for any kind of reading if you don't like reading books try graphic novels or magazines talk trash together about justin timberlake and jay-z anything strange is applicable.
. Make them something special to eat, or barter with someone you know who can make something really awesome [like cookies/cakes/veggie burgers/fries/salads,whatever] if you absolutely can not cook and present it as a surprise when they come home. Even if you decide to do something as simple as a sandwich make it special and an exciting event, light candles set up plates and cups and cloth napkins, try something creative and make little name placeholders for each of your seats with something as simple as a post-it folded in half and a pen to write each of your names.smalllllll details are so beautiful.
. Draw a picture of anything and dedicate to them, color a picture of anything out of a coloring book or the newspaper or an envelope, stick figures are always an A-OK in my book, it's the thought that counts and huge speech bubbles with strange/thoughtful conversations between these stick figures almost always is sure fire for a smile or giggle out of the recipient.
. Make an impromptu play out of hand shadows on your wall, maybe with your own soundtrack featuring your favorite songs together.
. The good ole standards - mixed cd/mixed tape/mixed play-list on mp3 player.
. Do your own dance lessons in your living room, pop on some youtube video that teaches you and have fun stumbling around the room stepping on each others toes and cracking up at your mad salsa/swing/gangsta dance skills.
. Make a one page zine for them, about how you met, your future, your alien counterparts, the way they do a certain thing that always makes you smile.
. Bring them to somewhere but don't tell them where until you get there [ like a puppy shop...okay maybe that's just for me.. but yes puppy stores almost always make people smile].
. Try a picnic in the park, all you need is a blanket and you can lounge for hours looking up at the sky and taking in a beautiful day together, falling asleep in each others arms in public or smooching and making all the bikers/walkers/small children uncomfortable with your blatant displays of affection.
. Like I said before, sing them a song doesn't matter if you have no skill, build a sheet fort in the house, hang out in a tree together and pretend to be woodland animals, blow bubbles in the house, try out your bathtub as a swimming pool, concoct bill nye the science guy experiments in the kitchen, label different parts of each others body as new plots of land with their own stories, paint each others nail with markers/pens/sharpies/white-out, have a Popsicle sword fight outside in the snow.
There is tooooooooo many choices, too many easy ideas, there is no excuse it just takes a little bit of brain power to come up with an idea that can really make someone's day a lot better or more special. No more excuses for laziness.
Okay, I think that is all.
Jem
